Mark Zuckerberg, if you’re reading this, please give Kanye the $1 billion dollars he needs. (You’re welcome, Kanye.)
Now that that is out of the way, let’s get down to the nitty gritty (nacho accent). Kanye West, y’all. Kanye West.
Okay, so I don’t know how many of you are aware of Kanye West’s recent Twitter activity. If you’ve missed it, here are a few of my highlights:
While most of his tweets made me wonder if North got a little trigger happy when Daddy left his phone unlocked, there were a couple of his tweets that kind of had me being like, “someone give this man a Ted talk”. For example:
Kanye West is like a controversial topic. The kind of topic you don’t bring up in sensitive environments, where people’s views are either pro or con. It’s right up there with politics and Birkenstocks. Don’t bring up Kanye if you’re at a birthday tea, don’t bring him up at your niece’s baptism and please don’t bring him up when someone is in a vulnerable state, e.g. when someone has just got out of the shower and they are sitting on their bed in their towel.
I think Kanye West is like the kind of person who you don’t go to when you’re having an emotional crisis. Like, he’s not the person you trust to watch your dog for the weekend; I’m not calling him up for a lift when I run out of petrol at 3am and to be honest, I think we all have a Kanye in our lives. If you don’t have a Kanye, my friend, you are the Kanye.
Now I feel like Kanye might seem a little bit far from the chicken’s nest, but a part of me can’t help but applaud this act. There is a genius that exists in Kanye that manifests itself in idiotically frosted tweets and misogynistic lyrics that make you feel attacked as a women, but at the same time the beat is so mooi you like, “no, booty stop” but your booty is like, “no, why?”. He somehow manages to make you feel offended, yet appreciated at the same time. He makes no sense, yet you understand him completely.
Like, for real tho, Kanye has an allure that people can’t ignore. The man has got people lusting after homeless couture and spanx that ends mid-calf. He’s got Kim dressing like she’s gotta hit the front row at 4pm and the gym at6pm. He has got us all calling him Yeezus and people still wanna call him an idiot. Nah fam, you’re the idiot (no offense).